Headlines

I know there's a great headline here...I just can't seem to come up with it myself.

"I've got one eye, I'm a PIRATE!"

Grown-ups and Dolts

Currently at the "house of plague" there is a chorus of medicine being distributed throughout the day (4 out of 5 family members). After watching me make multiple faces of disgust while taking some colorful geltabs (I hate swallowing pills), my oldest son asked quite inquisitively "what is that?" pointing to the geltabs. I explained that they were medicine for grown-ups, adults. (He understands the word "grown-up"...I'm working on "adult").

After I took the medicine, he said, "Mommy, are you an adult?" To which I replied "yes." Then he said, "Can kids be little dolts too?"

The color blue is already taken

There's a new argument brewing at our house. Our first-born is convinced that blue is his favorite color. I know I shouldn't laugh, but it is humorous to see him try to establish his ownership of the color when our second-born comments that blue is his favorite color too. ("But blue is MY favorite color!")

Considering our recent conversation about my dad, and the fact that I never knew there were exclusive rights available for common titles and colors, I'm starting to wonder if there are some things I haven't thought of that I'd better claim for myself :)

THAT cow doesn't moo

Let me preface this by saying I grew up on a small farm/ranch. As a kid exhibiting animals at the fair, it always amazed me to meet kids that didn't know where their milk/meat came from (aside from the grocery store).

Tonight, I made filet mignon for dinner. My husband was explaining to our son that meat comes from cows (steers if you want to get picky about it). When we sat down to eat, mine was too rare for my taste and I made some comment that it was still "mooing." After putting it on the grill a little longer, I sat down to eat.

My son said, "that's not a cow..."
So I poked it with my fork and said "sure it is...moo"
He replied, "THAT one doesn't moo!"

Am I gonna get a ticket?

In recent days Back-seat driver #1 has been very interested in "speed" - as in, "how fast are we going now? Are we going too fast? What happens if we go too fast?"

I explained that if we go too fast we will get a ticket from a police officer. I had to clarify that the "ticket" would be a bad thing (not like a ticket to go ride Thomas the Tank Engine).

So, yesterday he was spinning in circles in the living room and fell down. I asked what happened, and he said, "I was spinning too fast (pause)...am I gonna get a ticket?"

Why DO we buy so many toys???

I was catching up on some of my favorite blogs today, when one of Busy Mom's posts reminded me of a question I often ask myself: Why do we buy so many toys, when it's the everyday household items that seem to get the biggest kicks?

In the last few months I've posted about the kids playing in and with tupperware, dirt, food, toilet paper, a potty seat, a chair etc.

To drive the point home, here are a few photos of our oldest playing in boxes, and our second-born in of all things, a laundry detergent bucket.

Here's Your Sign

While approaching a stop sign today, our 3 1/2 year old practiced his emerging reading skills. He carefully spelled out "P.O.T.S." and then exclaimed "STOP!"

Maybe we should start with Hebrew instead of English.

Can I pull the trigger now?

The question our 3 1/2 year old asked this morning about flushing the toilet. Where does he come up with this stuff???

Discovery

Yesterday our 3 1/2 year made a startling discovery while going to the bathroom.

Son: "What's THAT?!!!"
Mom: "What's what" (not looking)
Son: "That! Behind my pee-pee!"

He was of course referring to the rest of his male anatomy. What is startling about that, you ask? Well, I guess it was startling to me that he just NOW noticed it.

Tinkertoy Mommy

When we brought Brawny Baby home from the hospital, I was introduced to my "stand-in" created by our 3 1/2 year-old. He affectionately referred to her as "Tinkertoy Mommy."

I wonder if I should be flattered or offended?

Going Postal

Maybe someone can explain this one to me. When my son (3 1/2) takes a bath, he likes to put this bowl on his head and proclaim, "I'm the mailman!" I don't really get it, but now he's got his little brother doing the same thing too.

"Need More Bread"

Much of the time our son has a rather angelic face, however during Christmas dinner our almost 2 year-old shocked us when he chanted out in a gruff voice (like something you'd expect to hear in the Exorcist) "NEED MORE BREAD...NEED MORE BREAD!" I wish I had an audio clip to go with the photo!

"Do you call my Grandpa 'Dad'?"

This morning at breakfast the following conversation took place:

Son: "Do you call my Grandpa 'Dad'?"
Me: "Yes, your Grandpa is my dad."
Son: "But I don't want you to call my Grandpa 'Dad'"

Baby Bjorn Lederhosen

Not long ago, my son asked if he could carry Brawny Baby in the Baby Bjorn. He was crest-fallen when I said he wasn't yet big enough to carry the baby. However he was easily appeased when I saddled him with his bear. The funny thing to me is that the carrier (obviously riding a little low) looks more like Lederhosen than a baby carrier.

A side note - I didn't know until tonight that "bjorn" means "bear". I don't know, but it seems to me there is a joke in here somewhere!

Potty humor of a 3 1/2 year-old

More laughs from the privacy of the bathroom:

"Did you see that little doink of poopy?" - (doink?!)
"Help! The poopy's caaaatching me!" - (trying to escape the rising pile under his bottom)
"Heeey, that poopy made a 'C'?" - (referring to the shape of the deposit)
"Oh, I didn't go poopy, that's just a piece of poopy" (what??!!!)

And in case you missed it, this is still my favorite post on the subject.

"I'm riding SHAMUUUU!"

Thank goodness my almost 2 year-old wasn't sitting on ME when he uttered those words, but my poor husband, he was rather shocked by the apparent comparison.

We were just at Sea World a couple weeks ago meeting my girlfriend of 30+ years. Nine of us (my friend and her three kids, me and my three kids, plus my nephew) climbed on the Shamu statue together and had our photo taken. Everyone except my almost 2 year-old cooperated. Considering his resistance on the statue, it surprises me that he would pretend to be "riding Shamu" again with his dad.

Just a side note, my friend and I met when I was two years old...so 30+ years doesn't age me quite as much as you might think :)

Old Mac Donald has diversified

Back in November I posted about the verses our 3 1/2 year-old added to Old Mac Donald had a Farm.

It would appear the old man has diversified his interests even more. Today our son was singing about his tree, burp cloth, house and ball. I haven't figured out the "tale tale here and a tale tale there," but I understand the ball with a "roll roll here and a roll roll there" because we don't bounce the ball in the house. :)

Also joining the chorus was our almost 2 year-old son (though it came out "Old Mac Donald hammy fammy, e-i-e-i-o"). I found it all rather entertaining, but I think my 14 year-old nephew who had just spent two and a half hours in the car listening to the "extended version" was ready to boot the old man off the farm.

I reveled in reminding him of the round after round of Down by the Station that he used to sing for the hour and a half trip back and forth to Sea World when he was little.

Right to Privacy?

Our oldest son has been at his Grandparents' house for the last week. It is his first time solo away from home. His 13 year-old cousin (my nephew) is also there.

Apparently today when my nephew was in the bathroom our son knocked on the door and said, "My Mom lets me come in when she's going."

(I let him come in? I didn't know I had a choice!!!)

Dirty Politics